Suicideboys Self-Inflicted Meaning and Review

$uicideboy$ return with a vengeance on “$elf-Inflicted,” the raw and unforgiving lead single from their upcoming fifth studio album Thy Kingdom Come. Fans of the New Orleans duo will immediately recognize the hallmarks of their signature style: grim lyricism, distorted bass, and nihilistic energy. The track opens with a jarring FTP tag and Ruby da Cherry’s voice tearing through with venom, setting the stage for an aggressive, confessional barrage. With production handled by Budd Dwyer (Scrim’s alter ego), the instrumental is a thunderous mix of murky 808s, eerie synths, and an atmosphere thick with dread and rebellion.

Ruby's Verse and Themes

Thematically, the song delivers exactly what its title promises: self-destructive introspection. Ruby’s verse is especially dark, with references to suicidal ideation, drug dependency, and lingering disillusionment with fame. His delivery oscillates between sarcasm and sincere anguish, exemplified by lines like “What the fuck’s my name? I forgot it / What day is today? Drugs prey on my brain.” These aren’t empty provocations. They are raw glimpses into the internal decay that has long defined $uicideboy$’s lyricism. Yet Ruby manages to lace his verse with black humor and bravado, making the pain feel both relatable and untouchable.

Scrim’s Energy and Delivery

Scrim’s verse brings a heavier, more aggressive energy that complements Ruby’s manic melancholy. His flow is tighter and more staccato, filled with punchlines, drug references, and political jabs like “Mind missin’ like Trump ballots” and “More guns than Barack’s pallets.” It’s a chaotic, spiraling verse that amplifies the paranoia and hostility that have become Scrim’s trademarks. Whether rapping about fatherly influence or flaunting his disregard for societal expectations, Scrim’s presence feels both unstable and magnetic, like a man teetering on the edge and daring you to look away.

Production and Legacy Connections

Sonically, “$elf-Inflicted” draws clear parallels to their Long Term Effects of SUFFERING era, which aligns with fan speculation that the track was conceived during that period. The inclusion of the FTP tag and the years-old snippet of Ruby’s verse only deepen the lore behind this song, lending it a sense of resurrection from the duo’s vault. It’s this kind of myth-building and cryptic rollout that keeps their fanbase ravenous and invested. “$elf-Inflicted” does not just drop. It haunts, echoing the group’s past while previewing a possibly darker chapter in their future.

Suicideboys Self-Inflicted Review

“Self-Inflicted” is a powerful and uncompromising return from $uicideboy$ that reaffirms their place in underground hip-hop. It is not a reinvention, but rather a sharpening of the blade they have always wielded: intense, brutally honest, and unapologetically grim. If this track is any indication of what Thy Kingdom Come has to offer, fans should prepare for a heavy dose of existential torment wrapped in some of the cleanest, hardest-hitting production in the duo’s career. Are you ready to suffer again?

Listen to Suicideboys Self-Inflicted 

Suicideboys Self-Inflicted Lyrics Meaning Explained

The meaning of Self-Inflicted by $uicideboy$ is rooted in the duo’s lifelong struggle with addiction, mental illness, and disillusionment with societal norms. The track serves as both a confession and a declaration, capturing the raw emotional core that has always defined their music. Through harrowing lyrics and sardonic references, Ruby da Cherry and Scrim confront their past traumas, suicidal ideation, and the irony of success after years of feeling worthless. The song is a reflection of their enduring pain, masked beneath layers of dark humor, violent imagery, and drug-induced numbness. It reinforces the $uicideboy$’ philosophy: that even with fame and fortune, inner suffering often remains unresolved.

Introduction

“(This was made exclusively for FTP)”

This line serves as the track’s opening tag and is likely a nod to the underground streetwear brand FTP (F**kThePopulation), which has a longstanding connection with the $uicideboy$ aesthetic and ethos. It’s speculated that “Self-Inflicted” was originally recorded for a now-shelved FTP collaboration tape, especially since a snippet of Ruby’s verse surfaced nearly five years prior. The sound and mood also align with their second studio album Long Term Effects of Suffering, implying this track may have been in production around 2020–2021.

“(Pull the trigger, Budd Dwyer)”

This is Scrim’s producer tag, referencing Budd Dwyer, a Pennsylvania politician who infamously died by suicide during a televised press conference in 1987. The tag has become an eerie signature in various G*59 tracks, including Chetta’s “Rebirth,” “Bleach,” and “Fight Club (Psychosis).”

Verse 1: Ruby Da Cherry

“Five to the nine to the grey, such a clan of mistakes”

A self-aware nod to G*59 Records, the independent label founded by the duo. Ruby refers to the label as a “clan of mistakes,” which plays into the $uicideboy$’ nihilistic self-image. It also reflects the idea that their rise came from trauma, rejection, and a sense of societal abandonment.

“I tried taking my life as a plan to escape”

A painfully honest confession. Both Ruby and Scrim have admitted in interviews (e.g., No Jumper Podcast) that they made a suicide pact early in their careers—if they didn’t succeed in music, they would kill themselves rather than live trapped in 9-to-5 jobs. This line cuts to the root of their name and philosophy.

“Never planned to get paid / All this cash in the bank got me laughin’ maniacally”

Ruby reflects on the irony of his current financial success. The duo’s music started as an emotional outlet for mental illness, not a career path. Now, with substantial income, he’s almost mockingly amused at his position—still haunted by the same inner turmoil but surrounded by wealth.

“Gas in the tank, no more askin’, ‘Please hire me’ / Beggin’, ‘Don’t fire me, sir, I’m so sorry I’m late’”

These lines express liberation from the conventional workforce. Ruby rejects the power dynamic of employers over employees, having once been stuck groveling for jobs. Now he’s financially independent and answers to no one.

“Now I am late when I wanna be, so I’m gonna be late / What the fuck’s my name? I forgot it”

These bars emphasize his detachment and mental fog. The ability to be late by choice reflects newfound autonomy. The disorientation in forgetting his name symbolizes heavy drug use and mental dissociation.

“What day is today? Drugs prey on my brain / Can’t stop it, keep on poppin’”

Ruby openly admits he’s still stuck in cycles of addiction. The blurry perception of time is a side effect of consistent substance abuse, which has been a theme in their music since the beginning.

“‘Oddy changed after the fame’ / Hahaha, bitch, I’m still the same piece of shit that you ignored in college”

“Oddy” is Ruby’s alter ego, Oddy Nuff da Snow Leopard. This line mocks those who claim he’s changed due to success. In truth, he still identifies with his earlier outcast self—the bitter loner overlooked in his youth.

Interlude: Scrim

“I swear to God, I hate every single one of you motherfuckers”

Scrim’s bitterness contrasts with Ruby’s reflective tone. This short outburst intensifies the rage and rejection that $uicideboy$ channel in their music. His disdain feels directed at both outsiders and perhaps even fans who misunderstand their pain.

Verse 2: Scrim

“Double cup, drownin’ my hurt / FTP all on my shirt / Told Zac, ‘I need me a Perc’”

These lines highlight Scrim’s continued struggle with substance abuse. “Double cup” is a reference to lean (a mix of codeine and soda), and the mention of Percocet reinforces this. His attire (“FTP all on my shirt”) maintains the duo’s link to the FTP brand.

“Starship, I’m whippin’ like Kirk”

A pop culture metaphor, referencing Star Trek’s Captain Kirk and positioning Scrim as a reckless space pilot in his own chaotic world. This also mirrors his producer tag: “Two to beam up, Scotty!”

“Might be off Addy and Xan / G*59 be the clan / Chew all my pills like my dad”

A troubling look into Scrim’s lineage of addiction. He mentions being on Adderall and Xanax, and draws a connection to inherited trauma, casually noting that his father also abused pills.

“Grab my dick, ‘He-He,’ I’m bad”

A playful, crude reference to Michael Jackson’s iconic ad-libs and crotch-grabbing dance moves, linking himself to MJ’s rebellious confidence. “Bad” was also Jackson’s seventh studio album.

“Fuck a stigma, I’m a drug addict / Mind missin’ like Trump ballots”

Scrim proudly rejects societal shame around drug addiction. The following metaphor is politically charged—referencing claims of voter fraud in the 2020 U.S. presidential election, suggesting his mental state is just as “missing” as those alleged ballots.

“Empty the jacket out the ratchet / More guns than Barack’s pallets”

A violent image. “Ratchet” means firearm, and this line exaggerates his arsenal, comparing it to military-grade weapon pallets possibly alluding to those associated with Barack Obama-era operations.

“Mind missin’ like ‘Hey, found it’ / I’m too foul like ‘Hey, count it’”

Wordplay implying mental instability (“mind missin’”), while using basketball slang like “count it” (a successful basket) to underline his chaotic bravado.

“Shoutin’ ‘Grey’ like I’m autistic / So high, broke the laws of physics”

Scrim likens his constant shouting of “Grey” (the group’s identity) to involuntary vocal tics associated with autism. The latter line is hyperbolic, using drug-induced euphoria to claim he’s defying the laws of nature.

Conclusion

“Self-Inflicted” is a brutally honest song that embodies everything $uicideboy$ are known for: defiance, trauma, drug addiction, existential dread, and gallows humor. Through layered references and visceral imagery, the duo exposes both the scars of their past and the dysfunctions that remain in the present.

Suicideboys Self-Inflicted Lyrics 

[Intro: Ruby Da Cherry]

(This was made exclusively for FTP)

Ruby, Ruby, Ruby

You don't fuckin' know me, bitch

(Pull the trigger, Budd Dwyer)

I'm tired of all these dudes

(Ayy, ayy, ayy, ayy, ayy)

Hmm, fuck your homies

(Ayy, haha)

Shut the fuck up and listen

(Ayy)

[Verse 1: Ruby Da Cherry]

Five to the nine to the grey, such a clan of mistakes

I tried taking my life as a plan to escape

Never planned to get paid

All this cash in the bank got me laughin' maniacally

Gas in the tank, no more askin', "Please hire me"

Beggin', "Don't fire me, sir, I'm so sorry I'm late"

Now I am late when I wanna be, so I'm gonna be late

What the fuck's my name? I forgot it

What day is today? Drugs prey on my brain

Can't stop it, keep on poppin'

"Oddy changed after the fame"

Hahaha, bitch, I'm still the same piece of shit that you ignored in college

Yah, yah, yah

[Interlude: Scrim]

(Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

I swear to God, I hate every single one of you motherfuckers

(Second world, ahh)

Ayy, ayy

[Verse 2: Scrim]

Double cup, drownin' my hurt (Ah)

FTP all on my shirt (Ah)

Told Zac', "I need me a Perc'" (Ah)

Starship, I'm whippin' like Kirk (Ah)

Might be off Addy and Xan (Ah)

G*59 be the clan (Ah)

Chew all my pills like my dad (Ah)

Grab my dick, "He-He," I'm bad (Ah)

Fuck a stigma, I'm a drug addict

Mind missin' like Trump ballots

Empty the jacket out the ratchet

More guns than Barack's pallets

Mind missin' like "Hey, found it"

I'm too foul like "Hey, count it"

Shoutin' "Grey" like I'm autistic

So high, broke the laws of physics